Should I tell my kids that I smoke
"I find the smokers particularly bad"
Which guys are you really upset about?
Parents whose children are allowed to do anything. I come into the treatment room. Jesse clears my drawers. Or Marie is sitting in my chair and jingling my keyboard. Or Friedrich-Gustav looks at my documents. “What is he doing there?” I ask. “Oh, I didn't even notice. Can't he do that? I thought it was a pediatrician practice. ”-“ No, these are my records. This is my doctor's office. There are things here that are dangerous, ”I say. I don't understand, it's an education for life.
Are there still a lot of authoritarian parents?
In any case. The children develop a hushed character, say nothing, and when you speak to them, the mother answers. Or in the provision, if the four-year-old should hop on one leg, build a tower or catch a ball. There are parents who say to their child: “But you can do that better.” Or: “You haven't painted that nicely now.” Or: “Doctor, he can't do that anyway.” So the child dares of course nothing at all.
What will they do then?
If it doesn't work at all, I ask the child: “Should we try it without mom? Shall we leave mom at the door? ”If that's okay with the child, I'll send the parent out. Suddenly everything works: it hops on one leg like a world champion and paints me great pictures. Madness.
Have you ever had child welfare cases?
I remember a teenager. It was also there as a precaution. We were already done, suddenly he looks at me and tells me that his father always beats him up badly. I asked him if we could discuss this with his mother. I was allowed to. It turned out that the violence was directed against them too. We have agreed that they have to take care of it, get help and establish contact with the youth welfare office.
That actually led to the fact that they separated from their father and that peace returned to the family. Otherwise, I experience cases of neglect. The teeth are bad, the child is neglected or diseases are spread. I try to keep in touch with the family, not allowed to offend them or threaten the youth welfare office. It is important that you have someone who can help you, open doors and point out ways to help you.
Are there moments when you achieve little?
Again and again. I find the smokers particularly bad. So families in which people smoke. That goes through all layers. Certain migrant families smoke more because they are socialized differently. When I ask them, everyone only smokes on the balcony, of course. But it's summer and the boy has been coughing constantly for six weeks, but otherwise has no particular infection, the lungs are free. These are clear indications that the parents smoke in the apartment.
Are you addressing it?
Absolutely. I can be very clear about that. After all, passive smoking plays a major role in chronic coughs, the development of allergies, house dust mite allergies and susceptibility to infection.
Let's talk about ADHD. How many cases do you have?
Two a month. If the child no longer functions in the school class, if it is offensive or if it no longer gets the grades, then it will be noticed. If you don't fit in, you have to be treated. That is also a social question.
How do you check that?
I test concentration and intelligence. I check whether the child might have a partial performance weakness or a reading and spelling weakness. Or an organic problem, a visual disorder, a hearing disorder. In the sum of these things you might get: Your child could have ADHD.
That is the key question. How do I handle this? Is it enough that parents and teachers are informed and respond to the child differently? Do you go to the forest once a week and let off steam? Is psychotherapy coming up? Do I give the child medication so that they can better process the unfiltered information?
Do you prescribe Ritalin?
Ritalin is the drug. The active ingredient is called "methylphenidate". But yes. Not in every case, like some colleagues. But I prescribe it when the level of suffering becomes too high, when it is no longer possible without it. Then they notice: Aha, now I can finally concentrate and block out everything else - the noises outside the window, the conversations my buddy had three banks down.
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